London Calling – February
Well hello again, its good to be back after the mid-Winter break. I always take a break from writing over Christmas to stop me from getting bitter and jaded….so here I am again champing at the bit and ready for the run in to the end of the season.
Unfortunately, Macclesfield helped to eradicate any benefit that the break has given me. Luckily I travelled up to Manchester on the Friday morning and had the weekend there enjoying the shopping and nightlife before travelling down to Macclesfield - the land that time forgot….
Every time I go to Macclesfield I say to myself, ‘Never again’. It’s not just the place, a throwback to the 1970’s (it could be the perfect setting for ‘Life on Mars’) or the ground, which is still constructed from leftover sheets of mdf and held together with plastic ties. Nor is it just the fact that there are no pubs close to the ground – there used to be one, but they knocked it down. It’s not the fact that you can’t park near the ground after two o’clock for love nor money, so you are forced to hang around the streets drinking cans of John Smiths outside the Spar on the corner or go into the uncovered away end and freeze your gonads off until kick-off. Nor is it just the fact that the lack of roofing in the away end can make 2,200 Carlisle fans sound no louder than Torquay’s annual carload of adolescents who visit Brunton Park on a Tuesday night in January.
No, what really wabbed me off this time was the fact that I had to pay twice, yes TWICE to see a game of such quality that it would have halved the crowd of Borough Park. The reason I had to pay twice was that I mistakenly paid to go in at the side of the ground, thinking that you would be able to walk round behind the goals. As soon as I discovered my mistake I asked to be let through so that I could meet up with my mates who I had travelled two hundred miles to meet. No go. Some jobsworth at the gate told me that I could only go through if there were people on the other side who wanted to come through this way. Some chance. Unbelievably though a couple of guys turned up who wanted to do just that. Ok let us swap then. Sorry, no can do. The jobsworth needs to get permission from the Chief Constable of Manchester, or his wife, before he can make a decision of any kind. After waiting for ten minutes for nothing to happen, we decided to try and negotiate our way out of the ground.
Unfortunately the turnstile operators cannot refund your money, neither can they let you out once you have gone in. Having found a policeman I then asked him if they could charge Macclesfield with wrongful imprisonment. He laughed. I didn’t. Eventually we managed to find someone who could let us out through a side exit through use of a padlock and key. God know what would have happened if there had been any trouble, such as a fire, at the ground. We asked if someone else could be let in for free, but this simple solution taxed the groundstaff’s intelligence to such an extent that they were speechless – unable to find an argument against this solution, but unable to agree to it without the Chief Constable of Manchester’s wife’s say so.
Having paid again at the right turnstile we took our places on the terraces to witness the most shambolic defensive performance since the days of Clive Middlemasses headless chickens. Had it not been for the fact that I had paid an admittance fee for myself and my girlfriend that would have bought us half a seat at Chelsea, I would have left after fifteen minutes. Well that and the fact that I had booked to go back to London on the 18.10 from Macclesfield and couldn’t face the idea of sitting on the soul-less railway station for several hours. The only plus factor is that a couple of years ago we might have seen this as a good result and analysed the action for signs that things were starting to pick up – but by this season’s standards this was an unacceptable display and the huge travelling support spent the afternoon poking fun at the stewards and revelling in a disco.
London Branch fans are looking ahead with eagerness to February as it sees the Blues visit Orient on the 11th and Barnet on the 25th both guaranteeing large turn-outs. In between several members are contemplating taking the ‘dream weekend’ of United v Rushden on the 18th; Liverpool Youth v Carlisle Youth on the 20th and the first leg of the Northern Final on the 21st before returning to London on the 22nd. I for one, will NOT be travelling to Macclesfield for the second leg……
See you on our travels
Malcolm Fawcett
Information@carlislelondonbranch.org